What’s Up, Essay?

To prove how ludicrous my school’s agenda is, I’ll be posting a recent essay I had to write for one of my classes. I won’t give too much away, but it involves comparing Jane Eyre to Ramen noodles. It was an easy essay, but the hard part was refraining from making jokes. Kathy- as you are both a fan of Jane Eyre and soup- this one’s for you.

            In my project, I chose to reflect upon Mr. Rochester and Mrs. Reed. For the sake of this exercise, I will focus on Mr. Rochester, as he is definitely more pasta-like than Mrs. Reed. The pasta that he is related to is none other than the world-famous Ramen noodles. In this essay, I will address his physical relations to the noodle, as well as his metaphorical relations to it.

            For starters, Mr. Rochester is probably a white guy. This is convenient, because Ramen, although being from Japan, has a distinctive Caucasian tinge to their noodles. Mr. Rochester is short and has a well-built, athletic body. He is boxy, but thin, which is a prime characteristic of Ramen noodles. He also wears clothes, which I guess would be the packaging of the noodles.

            On a deeper level, Mr. Rochester is like Ramen noodles because he is very hard, cold, and sarcastic. He can stand u for himself, but he breaks easily. If you recall, he falls off his horse and breaks his ankle. Later, after his crazy Creole wife and part-time incendiary, Bertha Mason, sets fire to the house, he loses an eye, his vision, and a hand. How careless. Ramen noodles might burn easily too, but I haven’t reached that part of my science fair project yet. You can enjoy Mr. Rochester on his own, but he is not really complete until you add Jane Eyre- the hot water- to the mix. Finally, some people like to add the optional flavor package, which are the new emotions Jane teaches him. Before you know it, lunch is over and Edward Rochester has metamorphosed from a stale packet of Japanese cuisine to a delicious pile of noodle and compassion.